Are you in the "grief club"?

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Grief.

Grief is an enemy and a friend. That is why when you have experienced extreme grief you feel connected to others who have as well. You feel part of the same “club”.

This “grief club” knows that grief is like a torturous villain that surprises you with his presence. When you least expect it fills your heart with so much pain you feel like you could die.

This “grief club” knows that grief is like riding a roller coaster in the dark. You don’t know when you’re going to go up and then plummet down without warning.

This “grief club” knows that grief has no time limit and is a chronic diagnosis . The symptoms just change over the years and you know that you will never be cured.

This “grief club” knows that there are so many things worse than death. Those outside of the “club” are perhaps afraid of death, those inside know that heaven is the only thing that brings peace. This world is where all the pain is and it breaks our hearts that others don’t see that.

This “grief club” knows that you feel insane talking to someone who isn’t there. 

This “grief club” knows that our pain is uniquely ours and uniquely shared.

This “grief club” knows that everyone expresses it differently, but there isn’t a person who it doesn’t express it eventually.

This “grief club” knows how lonely it is to grieve the same person with other people because we all have bad days on different days.

This “grief club” knows that grief allows you so many joys. To live life to the fullest…. like you were dying! Grief allows you to laugh through pain and take the trip and go on the walk and snuggle your loved ones so fiercely that you are giddy. 

The “grief club” knows the guilt of happiness. When we have happy days we are afraid we are forgetting the pain that our grief has provided.

The “grief club” knows that grief feels good because love is a gift and with extreme love is extreme grief.

The “grief club” feels the anger that our grief was what we needed to make us a better person and see a bigger picture.

The “grief club” knows that God is love and peace and hope, not death.

The “grief club” knows that grief is communal. You have your own but then you also have a unifying grief with each person you knew together.

To my fellow “grief club” members:

Thank you for sharing your tears with me.
This is how we’ve bonded.
This is how we have met people we can never meet.
This is how we know we can trust one another.  
This is love.

I’m so grateful to you all for getting me through these last 5 years.

“I am Not Alone” Kari Jobe also got me through!

Video for the song "I Am Not Alone" by Kari Jobe. From the album "Majestic".

Listen to this episode of the Find the Beauty Podcast

 
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MEET THE AUTHOR

Kari Turner Davis is a Holistic Life Coach and dōTERRA Essential Oils Educator. Recently named a dōTERRA Diamond leader, Kari is passionate about empowering women with the tools they need to reach financial freedom while educating moms to embrace the idea of a natural and non-toxic lifestyle. Kari and her husband, Bobby, live in Naples, Florida with their combined five children. They enjoy boating, spending time together as a family and creating an enjoyable lifestyle that revolves around filling up your tank to serve others in a higher capacity.