Calm the Chaos in Toxic Relationships

Are toxic relationships wreaking havoc on your hormones and causing you unwanted stress and anxiety?

Whether it’s summer travel and being around a lot of different people compared to your normal routine, or you have that one relationship in your life that has always been a difficult one and you can’t completely separate yourself from that relationship, I hope to share some helpful insight to work through these toxic relationships. (Notice I said, toxic relationships, not toxic people).

Nothing puts me into a stressful state like managing conflict and tension in relationships. Side note.. this summer, I’m working from home with all our kids home…. did you know that mothers who spend all day with their children produce MORE cortisol (the stress hormone) than 98% of the world's paying professions? Whew.

In episode 159, I share some of the information I’ve learned along the way from my dear counselors and I hope that what I share will help you support yourself but also your family, so you can calm the chaos in your home with these relationships.

First and foremost, all relationships need to show love and respect. Simple, right. But relationships are done between imperfect people. What I dive into with this episode are the toxic traits I’ve witnessed in relationships and on the flip side, some keys to build healthy relationships.

The toxic relationships in my life have usually had a cocktail of these traits:

Sarcasm: which relies heavily on tone and context making it prone to misinterpretation. Our kids don’t always get this.

Passive Aggressive is sarcasm’s close cousin. It sounds like avoidance, sarcasm, subtle jabs, and/or procrastination

Bad communication. We could talk about this forever, but suffice it to say: say what you mean and mean what you say
Lack of honoring others’ boundaries in space, time, money, priorities - none of us know what is happening in other’s lives. Lack of honoring others’ boundaries can also sound a lot like passive aggressive judgements.
Emotional manipulation which can show itself in

Logic
Guilt Trips
Helplessness (playing the victim)
Flattery
Threats
Gas lighting (manipulation when someone subtly or intentionally distorts another’s perception of reality causing them to doubt their own memory, judgment, or sanity.
5. Constant criticism.